Comparison is the thief of joy...
Just sayin'.
But we all do it. We all compare. I don't know about you all but I do. It's something that I am working on. And I don't do it with everything. I really only do it with running. Life is funny that way. Allowing me to really hone in on my area of comparison.
I don't normally compare myself as a teacher, photographer, mother, wife, daughter, friend or any of the titles I carry because they are so personal to me. I am who I am and I am a happy person. Lovin life. It's all good! Not gonna say it doesn't happen once in awhile but for the most part I'm pretty solid on not being too hard on myself. BUT only as a runner. Maybe because this is something I never saw myself doing. I am much more aware of it. Maybe because I know the road ahead. Maybe because I like to play head games with myself? Trust me I'd much rather just think of all the positive things that come along with this challenge. I MEAN I AM GETTING US CLOSER TO A CURE FOR CANCER. I pray. I pray I am. I pray every day that I am.
I need to train my brain to only compare & compete with myself. Because even though it's this 'one thing', this 'one thing' takes up a lot of my running time and allows me a lot of thinking time. It takes up too much head space. Thinking time, comparing time, questioning time. Good times I tell you. Good. Times.
But guess what? I work with a prophet. I really do. So here is the conversation we had.
Me: I have a problem.
Prophet: What. (The first what doesn't usually warrant a question mark, it's usually more of a statement). What is it? What is the matter?
Me: I feel like I compare myself and blah blah blah.
Blah blah blah blah blah blah (a lot of talking) blah blah blah.
Prophet: You can't compare yourself to anyone but you.
Everyone has bags. Let's call it luggage. Everyone's luggage is different. Some people only have like a small carry on or a small back pack. You have everyone's luggage and it's like you are running through Logan airport on the night before Thanksgiving dodging people. Stop doing that. Put everyone else's luggage down. Just carry your own. And stop thinking your luggage compares in size and shape to other people. It doesn't.
Me: Are you saying I have baggage?
Prophet: No. Luggage. It's different. It's about what's on your plate and the time you have available for all of it. Everyone has a different plate filled with different things.
(Now we are talking about food and I am starving all the time).
But you have a lot and your own luggage has it's own little luggage and you are taking care of that too and you should, it's your job but stop thinking it's the same as other people's luggage because it's not. Stop comparing.
I have to say I was exhausted after that conversation but she's so right. I just began this journey last year. I have logged a lot of miles but I still have so many to go. I need to stop worrying about time and when and where and how just do it. I need to stop thinking about what other people are doing and just do it.
Just doing it isn't always easy. It's NOT as easy as Nike says. It's really, really hard but if it's something that you really want it's doable. I hope. I pray.
Sooooo I leave you with all of this because it was too good not to share. She's really really right. I wish I was right that much.
But we all do it. We all compare. I don't know about you all but I do. It's something that I am working on. And I don't do it with everything. I really only do it with running. Life is funny that way. Allowing me to really hone in on my area of comparison.
I don't normally compare myself as a teacher, photographer, mother, wife, daughter, friend or any of the titles I carry because they are so personal to me. I am who I am and I am a happy person. Lovin life. It's all good! Not gonna say it doesn't happen once in awhile but for the most part I'm pretty solid on not being too hard on myself. BUT only as a runner. Maybe because this is something I never saw myself doing. I am much more aware of it. Maybe because I know the road ahead. Maybe because I like to play head games with myself? Trust me I'd much rather just think of all the positive things that come along with this challenge. I MEAN I AM GETTING US CLOSER TO A CURE FOR CANCER. I pray. I pray I am. I pray every day that I am.
I need to train my brain to only compare & compete with myself. Because even though it's this 'one thing', this 'one thing' takes up a lot of my running time and allows me a lot of thinking time. It takes up too much head space. Thinking time, comparing time, questioning time. Good times I tell you. Good. Times.
But guess what? I work with a prophet. I really do. So here is the conversation we had.
Me: I have a problem.
Prophet: What. (The first what doesn't usually warrant a question mark, it's usually more of a statement). What is it? What is the matter?
Me: I feel like I compare myself and blah blah blah.
Blah blah blah blah blah blah (a lot of talking) blah blah blah.
Prophet: You can't compare yourself to anyone but you.
Everyone has bags. Let's call it luggage. Everyone's luggage is different. Some people only have like a small carry on or a small back pack. You have everyone's luggage and it's like you are running through Logan airport on the night before Thanksgiving dodging people. Stop doing that. Put everyone else's luggage down. Just carry your own. And stop thinking your luggage compares in size and shape to other people. It doesn't.
Me: Are you saying I have baggage?
Prophet: No. Luggage. It's different. It's about what's on your plate and the time you have available for all of it. Everyone has a different plate filled with different things.
(Now we are talking about food and I am starving all the time).
But you have a lot and your own luggage has it's own little luggage and you are taking care of that too and you should, it's your job but stop thinking it's the same as other people's luggage because it's not. Stop comparing.
I have to say I was exhausted after that conversation but she's so right. I just began this journey last year. I have logged a lot of miles but I still have so many to go. I need to stop worrying about time and when and where and how just do it. I need to stop thinking about what other people are doing and just do it.
Just doing it isn't always easy. It's NOT as easy as Nike says. It's really, really hard but if it's something that you really want it's doable. I hope. I pray.
So I've been thinking a lot about what she said. I even told my mom (in an email) who printed out the email to hang on her cork board as a reminder of what's important and to stop comparing. My mom doesn't usually do that. It has to be important (or really cute and vintage) for her to print it out and hang it on her cork board.
So I will keep on keeping on and forget the ugly stuff that sometimes goes along with keeping on keeping on. Because comparison is the thief of joy. (I forget who said that, it wasn't me clearly because I like to steal all the joy from myself?)
Sooooo I leave you with all of this because it was too good not to share. She's really really right. I wish I was right that much.
So much love per usual (I love saying per usual, it sounds fancy)
Wishing you all an AMAZING Thanksgiving with your family and friends. Just be. Take it all in. Breathe. Enjoy. Eat. Run. Don't run. Do whatever it is that makes you happy!
If it makes you happy to donate to a girl running 26.2 to kick cancers ass then by all means.
I am JUST under 2k...
2k!!!!!!
If it makes you happy to share this blog and this link. Just do it.
I am so THANKFUL and so BLESSED to be on this road with you all.
love
t
Love my people...